When I die...

this is one of our favorite spots on the property

We love our home. We love our land. Our kids love it here. They are able to run, play in the creek, ride bikes through the "maze" Daddy cut with the tractor in the pasture, swing way too crazy high on the ginormous tire swing, grow flowers in their own flower gardens, catch lightning bugs. We are so comfortable here. We have annual hoedowns on the land and in our barn (the hay is now out). Hubby keeps threatening to use the barn as it is intended, but the girls and I protest. We MUST save it for get togethers!!

But, when I die I don't want people to say "wow, she had 13 acres!". Really? ! That would absolutely stink. This is what we've always wanted for our family. Finding it took years, but once we drove up the overgrown driveway, purchasing it was smooth sailing. We do believe God had his hand in the entire process. We submitted our crazy, very low (embarrassing) offer, and the owner accepted. Many details worked out in only God fashion.

And so we pray. We pray for clear direction. We see ourselves growing old here. We have plenty of room for our special needs kiddos to stay home forever or to build them a small house in the pasture for semi-independent living. It is a fabulous place to raise our children.

This is where the guilt creeps in. Really, how can we have 13 acres and others have nothing? I mean nothing as in a tiny closet for a house with no running water and a dirt floor. No food. No mommy and daddy. We do feel like God lead us to this place for a very specific reason and are asking for His guidance. Were we lead here to eventually sell and use the profit for orphan ministry? Are we suppose to stay here and physically use the land to further His kingdom? Remember, I said it is a perfect place to raise a family (read...LARGE family). Could this be a place where not only Charlie lives when he's older, but a place that could benefit many people with special needs? Is this the place where we are suppose to build a teen barn for hanging out and Bible studies? I loved that vision- we've already named it the "Back Porch".

What we do know is that we can't keep it, hoard it, and do nothing. And so we continue to pray for God to reveal to us His mighty plans for Westbend (that's what I've always called our land- hubby thinks I'm nuts!).

In Him,

E

Prayers please!

I cannot say more than we need your prayers. No, it does not involve any of our children and my hubby and I couldn't be better.

God's timing is perfect.....yet we hesitate- always! Please, pray for our family and for the wisdom we desperately need to hear from Him!
In Him,
E

My kids ROCK!!

Geez! I know that my blog has been focused on Charlie and his surgery these past couple of weeks, but I do have 3 other children!! These girls truly are the light of my life (in addition to 2 handsome guys who reside here!). And I feel as I've been given quite the mix- a take-charge redhead, a nutty beyond belief middle and a quiet little.

Our girls have had to deal with the many emotions of domestic adoption, failed international adoption and open heart surgery right along with us and have SHINED through it all!! And all those things happened in less than one year. That's not to say that they haven't wept and haven't been scared, but each of them have sought refuge in HIM and He has seen us through. Each time we get back to some sort of "normal" (whatever that may be!), we move on to the next adventure that the Lord has set before us.

And what truly moves me to tears is that they get it. They get that God has a plan for each of us. They get that we need to lay our own desires aside and do those things that are quite uncomfortable many times. They get special needs and know that it's WAY cool to have a brother with Down Syndrome. And you know what else they get and are excited about? The fact that one day they may be able to share us with even more littles with special needs.

It's not always fun to have to share Mom and Dad, and I'm sure that sometimes it even stinks. But my girls amaze me at how gracious they are when they see someone else's need. They are already becoming great advocates for people with special needs.

Each one of them says that they will adopt one day- I know God is smiling at that one!! Imagine, that fewer children in need of homes!! And to know that my girls will have a part in sharing God's love with those angels! Awesome.

And no, they are NOT angels and get me fired up often enough! Then I look at faces like these, and I forget about it all (most of the time:).

In Him,

E

Oh my HEAVENS!!

I know this picture is very blurry, but I absolutely LOVE it!!

Just look at this boy! Oh, I could eat him up!!

He is now officially what many people call- "a member of the Zipper Club"! And he's sportin' it pretty proudly, don't you think?!

We made the hour+ trip today back down to the hospital for Charlie's post-op visit. Of course, he is doing fantastic! They snipped the few sutures he had at the base of his scar (see the little hole) where the chest tube had once been. He has lost a bit of weight, but that is expected. Hopefully, his weight will be back to normal by next week. We have a tough time getting over the 17lb mark, though. He's been hanging out right around 17 for the past couple months, it seems. The surgeon put him on Lasix to help rid his body of all the extra fluid that heart surgery patients tend to produce for a bit after surgery. When he was discharged from the hospital, he was prescribed to take Lasix 3 times a day. Yuck! Today, after the surgeon witnessed that Lasix is indeed doing it's job very well (all down my leg!:), he decided that Charlie only needs to take it twice a day. Thank you! So, we have a follow up next week with our regular cardiologist and that's it. Hopefully, Charlie won't have the need to see another heart doctor except for the occasional check-up.

He is in a bit of pain now that the anesthesia is almost completely out of his system. Please, pray for all pain and discomfort to be gone!!

There are so many people I want to thank who have lifted us up these past couple of weeks. First, I KNOW that Charlie would not be where he is today if it not for all the prayers lifted to Our Father in his behalf. Charlie is a miracle with a healed heart, and it's all because of our Father's healing hand.

Mom and JJ- thanks for stepping up and taking care of our girls....again.:) Mom, thanks for sitting through the 4 hour gymnastics meet. And JJ, thank you for watching yet another Barbie Princess movie!!

Mom, Linda, Lamar, Laura and Bev- thanks for waking up early and driving over an hour through the rain to hold our hands during one of the most scary mornings of our lives. Your prayers and presence eased our minds just enough to make it through until we saw sweet Charlie's face again.

Auntie M, Uncle Pish and Stella- thank you so much for the groovy shirt (pictured above)!! Charlie is definitely a "Tough Cookie"!

Valerie- thanks for the food! BBQ...yummy!!!

Shelby and Mark- thanks for the glider to help soothe our little one while he hurts. It's helped calm him the past couple of nights when he needed it most.

Tara and your 4th grade class- thank you for the cards!! They were beautiful and will be treasured forever!! (Ya'll I will share a few of the cards written by these sweeties soon. They were awesome!)

All those who emailed, called and texted- thank you for thinking of us, praying for us and remembering us during your weekend.

I have so many emails I still need to respond to. Some are about surgery. Others adoption. And still there are those who just want to chat. Please, know that I am ever so slowly making my way through my inbox. I promise I'll get to you! Anna, I will send you that address tonight!

In Him,

E

Home sweet home!!

This isn't a photo from last week, but a photo from our ride home.....from the hospital!!

Can you believe that just a few days ago our sweet angel was just being taken from mommy's arms for a major, life saving surgery?! And today......WE'RE HOME!!

The doctors, nurses and entire staff at Egleston were blown away at how quickly Charlie bounced back. Sunday, the only tube he had left was an IV in his foot. The nurses are quite efficient- look at how they protected his foot (from himself!:). He has a board under the diaper keeping his foot still.

Before even thinking about discharging C, they did more testing- bloodwork, x-ray and echo. And each test came back with flying colors. His oxygen saturation levels were in the high 90s (95-99) continuously since being transferred to the Cardiac Stepdown Unit. He was eating well, wetting well and playing. Since the hospital is not a place you really want to be because of all the germs, the doctors really wanted to get him home. So...home we went.

The diaper on his foot- this absolutely cracked me up every time I looked at it.

SO happy to be home playing.

I will update later this evening. Charlie is sleeping and I am exhausted, but there's much to do. I will never be able to thank each of you enough for the support and prayers that lifted us up during this very scarey time. God truly sent many, many prayer warriors to us and healed our angel!

In Him,

E

Caution......This will take your breath away!!

Can you believe this is the same child?!! It's been roughly 30 hrs since he came out of surgery, and he is captivating everyone's heart with his charm. Oh, how our Lord has mighty plans for this young man! Thank you Jesus for entrusting us with your angel.

You may be able to see the redness on his face and chest. This is from all the tape and sticky stuff that was holding tubes and monitors on his body. Evidently, many children have this after everything is removed, but his face looks a bit swollen to me. We'll be watching these areas specifically over the next day or so. Thank you for your continued prayers for our angel! He is rockin'!!!
In Him,
E

In Mom's Arms!!!

Better Than Chocolate!

Praise God from whom all Blessings flow! Charlie is officially tube FREE with the exception for the one in his foot (for medicine). As we were walking through the doors this morning Charlie began to cry and I don't believe I have ever seen E wash her hands that fast! Immediately by his side the nurse gave permission to hold him. In mom's arms he took about an ounce of food and was fast asleep. Two and half hours later I'm starting to wonder when my turn will come?

In Him
E's hubby

Off oxygen and eating well!

Way to go, angel face! Charlie is eating well and is completely off oxygen. He had a good feed around 7am and has been sleeping soundly since. We aren't going to be able to get back in to see him until at least 10:30 (EST)- they are doing rounds and we have to be out of the way. Hubby and I are going to grab a quick breakfast then call to see if we can return to the CICU.

One of the surgeons came by this morning and is confident that most tubes (chest tube, arterial neck IV, IV in groin and a couple others) will come out today. If they are ready for him in the Cardiac Step Down Unit, he quite possibly will be transferred out of CICU.

Charlie did have a bit of a fever (101) during the night but it could have been due to the trauma of surgery itself. They gave him a bit of Tylenol, and it's been normal ever since. His glucose was also a bit elevated, but it could have been because they tested right after a feeding. So, please pray that all these "kinks" will be worked out and that God will continue to miraculously heal our angel. He is such a fighter and determined to be home very soon!:)

I'll update later with pictures and a new charity of my heart.
In Him,
E

Success!

Charlie is doing incredibly well. The extubation was successful, and he's breathing completely on his own with tiny baby puffs of oxygen. The oxygen tubes in his nose should come out very soon. Tonight they are keeping him comfortable and will try to feed him a bit- pedialyte first then formula if he does well. Tomorrow he will probably begin loosing many other tubes. It's still up in the air as to when he may leave CICU and head over to Cardiac Step Down, and it all depends on how he does.

Before I sign off for the night I have a VERY URGENT prayer request. About an hour ago there was a "code blue" in the Cardiac Step Down Unit. We all know what that means. I have no idea who the child was or what the outcome was, but please lift up this child and family tonight. Just hearing "code blue" is enough to frighten any parent. We were assured that they never announce a page for code blue in the CICU and shouldn't be alarmed if we hear it. But we do need to pray for each angel fighting tonight.

Charlie's CICU area. This wing is new and beautiful- check out all the light pouring in. I know many of you have seen a room like this before, but I wanted to share what his space looks like. Look at all those monitors! The girls and I made "Charlie's Prayer Warrior" shirts this week. You can see the Bible verse on the back- And the prayer offered in faith will make the sick person well; the Lord will raise him up. If he has sinned, he will be forgiven. James 5:15

Our first glimpse of him after the breathing tube came out.

Tonight waking up a bit. Dare I say he gave us a half smile!! Oh, he is such an angel!

In Him,

E

Breathing on his own!!!

Charlie is now breathing on his own. This is HUGE! We are in the Family Lounge while they extubate him (take out breathing tube). Pray he continues to breathe without assistance and extubation is successful.
In Him,
E

Post surgery...WE'VE SEEN HIM!!!

Praise the LORD!! We've seen our mighty warrior, and he looks great! Color is wonderful. He's still on the ventilator, but the staff hopes that he'll be breathing on his own by this evening. What a miracle our Lord performed today!

Please, continue to lift Charlie up before God. These next several hours are the most critical- breathing, fluid, blood pressure...

**Pictures below are graphic**

In Him,

E

Closing his chest

Repair is successful!! Our angel is off bypass, and they are closing him up!! PRAISE THE LORD!
In Him,
E

Surgery is underway

He was taken back around 7:25...sound asleep. The surgeon began about 8:50 (EST). Please, pray that God will guide the surgeon's hands and completely heal Charlie's heart.

We will be updated in about an hour and I'll post here.

In Him,

E

Surgery Eve

Soaking up some love from his girls this morning. Someone told my dad that the girls were "Charlie's Angels", and so that's their new name.

Whew, what a day!! It all began with the girls getting up early for some last hugs and kisses before Charlie's big day. Do you think he's loved?!!

Notice my "silly bands". I am not a fan, but these 2 bands are dear to my heart. Story coming...tomorrow maybe.

After a 2 hour trip to Egleston at Emory, we finally made it. Atlanta traffic makes me crazy!! I won't bore you with all the details, so let's just say that he is a charmer. Smiling all day long and wowing the ladies.

This boy is flexible. He loved his glowing foot.

Sorry it's blurry, but he just started clapping this week- look how happy he is!! And this is during the 5th hour at the hospital.

We met much of the staff that will be there for surgery tomorrow. He had all sorts of tests-

x-ray, echocardiogram, lab work, etc. And a little over 6 hours later....we were finished!

We are now at the Ronald McDonald house. This house is new and absolutely stunning. What a blessing RMD is for families whose children have medical needs.

Ronald McDonald house

The garden at RMD house- Charlie with Daddy.

PLEASE join me in prayer for sweet Charlie tomorrow. He will be taken back to the OR between 7:00-7:20. Surgery should take anywhere between 4-6 hours. I'll try to post short updates with prayer requests as they are needed.

Charlie is a fighter, but he needs many warriors standing before God for him. Feel free to spread the word about surgery and lead others back here. Thank you so much for the outpouring of support. I stand in awe of the many, many people who have never met our angel yet continue to pray for him.

His betadine bath before bed

And peacefully dreaming tonight...

In Him,

E

Emotional week.....Princess Chrissie

I don't even know where to begin. I've had a very emotional week. Honestly, I had no idea I would be so emotional the days leading up to Charlie's surgery. For what seems to be no reason at all, I begin crying. Today has actually been an okay day. Better than yesterday. Poor Cherri (our homestudy/post placement caseworker). She was here yesterday doing another post placement visit for Charlie, and I was even teary with her. Over silly things!! Cherri, we love you!! I'm sorry!! I don't know if she'll ever feel comfortable updating our study and approving us for more littles after seeing what an emotional crazy woman I am!!

Everyday I spend much time thinking and praying for Princess Chrissie and the entire Patterson family. I just sat down to check on her for the first time today and read that during the night she passed away. CHRISSIE IS NOW AN ANGEL....dancing her heart out with Her King!! What a day for her!! Such joy and peace and completeness. And as joyous as she is, her Mommy, Daddy and brothers and sisters are left here to grieve a tremendous loss. I stand in awe of Lorraine's faith and know that today, in the midst of her grief, she too is rejoicing. For her angel, Chrissie, is now pain free and her heart is finally whole!

My Mom asked me several weeks ago if knowing Chrissie and all she was going through scared me when thinking about Charlie's surgery. I told her "no" because God's plan for each of our children is mightier than our own. We are so unworthy of the blessings that each of them bring to our lives and cherish every single moment we have with them. Each of our children have left their own mark on the world already. And our sweet, sweet boy has changed our lives in ways that we never knew possible.

So, today, instead of worrying about what this Friday brings, I am choosing to love my boy. Hug my boy and tell him how much I and his glorious Father in Heaven love him. I am choosing to memorized every detail of his tiny face and shower him with one million kisses. I am forgetting the dust that hides under the sofa and the vaccuming that needs to be done. I just want to be with him. I urge you to do the same with each of your children for we never know what plans our Father has for us.

Thank you Patterson family for sharing your story and your angel with the world!! God has used all of you for HIS GLORY!!

In Him,

E

Is it really okay?

Who said it was really okay to call a surgical patient's family just 4 days prior to surgery to tell them that $5,400 must be paid TODAY for surgery to happen Friday?!! Really, we have NEVER heard from them- no calls, no mail- until today. The lady who called is filling in and didn't know why we hadn't been called and couldn't find any record of them ever trying to contact us. Over the past several weeks I have called our insurance company several times making sure certain things were going to be covered, finding out out-of-pocket expenses and other things that make you feel all warm and fuzzy, but I've never heard from the surgeon's office. UGH!

Prayers please. Off to dig pennies out from under sofa cushions....
In Him,
E

Signs....

Oh, my poor family! I promise that I will find another place to do this. I have been using my hubby's shop, but the problem is that it's not connected to the house so I'm not connected to my kids when I'm out there.

The signs are taking over. As you can see, some are half finished. That seems to be the story of my life- everything half finished. I was getting letters ready then realized that I forgot the "z" and "y" for "crazy". So instead of getting them done, I moved on to a new word. Can't stay in one place too long!! I suppose I'll finish those tonight. And not only that, but I haven't attached any of the letters yet! If you order a sign, rest assured it will include all letters attached to the wood! And the letters will be straight- I just realized how cattywhompas many of the letters are.

In the meantime, I have many sign ideas swirling around in my head. Oh, I think I'll go right now and make one that says "kiss me". Wouldn't that be lovely above a bed! And my oldest thinks I need to make one to put over the potty that says "sit".......right after I finish "crazy love".

In Him,

E